Okay, I feel like there's a number of things that bear mentioning, today, and mostly good news, at that. So let me just get this out of my system before I really get into the swing of my blog entry...
YAY!!!
All right, now that I've gotten that out of my system, maybe I should share some of the causes of my childlike exuberance. I am fairly certain that Master actually likes the childlike exuberance, so there is always the justification that being exuberant isn't going to get me in trouble. She likes it when Her little girl is happy, and today, Her little girl is really happy, despite some ever-present negatives that I can't really escape yet. Like having woken up with a headache, or having a dog that whines when, and only when, my adoptive mother is around. I just want to say, Fawn is a very good dog, she is an incredible and sweet dog... except when my adoptive mother is around, which is when she whines, incessantly, and gets me yelled at and insulted. I get enough denigration and condescension on my own without your help, knock it off. I love you, but cut that shit out right now. Seriously.
However, there's positives! Lots of them, in my opinion, that make me absolutely ecstatic in a way I haven't been in two decades.
So where to begin? I think I'll begin with the phone call, since it's all thanks to Master in one way or another, and some of the subsequent feelings of excitement stem from certain things that She said, or shared, with me. I got to talk to Master for 8 minutes of absolute heaven. Her voice... ohh, wow. Her voice sets me at ease, it fills me with joy, it makes the whole world seem brighter, and cleaner. That right there was enough to neutralize a headache or two with just the happiness I felt no matter what else was going on.
In the course of the phone-call, however, She expressed very great confidence that I would be able to get down to Tennessee in January, and this makes me happier than I can remember being ever before in my life. Especially when She expressed confidence that I would be able to stay there, and that I wouldn't need to come back to my adoptive family except to get my stuff. That makes me just like, amazingly happy.
Then in the course of the phone-call, She also told me that She had bought some gifts for me. Okay, so there's only one of them that I'm actually going to put my hands on and touch it, the others... well, let's just say they're going to be touching me more than I'm going to be touching them. She got me a leather collar, and some toys She'll be able to use to play with me, and I'm looking forward to that with a lot of anticipation. I'm looking forward to a lot of things She's promised to do to me, though. I can't wait.
Then there's Eric. He's a positive because of Master as well, because if it were not for Master, I do not think I would have ever had the opportunity to know him. I have only really "known" him since the first of November, although I knew of him for years before that, he's Master's fiancee, and we have talked a few times online, and briefly on the phone. I'd like to talk to him on the phone some more, I guess, but I'm going to get to see and talk to him a lot in person. That's going to be great, because, I think I'm really starting to love him, too. Not in the same context as I love Master, of course, or at a bare minimum, not yet. Could I fall in love with him, too? I think so, he's just been a lovely, amazing person. He's been absolutely wonderful, he's made me feel welcomed, accepted, even invited into the dynamic and like I've been totally embraced by someone that did not have to accept me, even though they chose to do so. That is unfortunately more heartwarming than I have words to describe accurately, and he's a major part of what makes this such a comfortable relationship and situation, for me.
I've also been making a lot of good friends on FetLife. Out of respect, I won't put their actual names on here without them giving me express permission, but sufficed to say, they are just some of really the most amazing people. I've even met a couple of Satanists and that's really opened my eyes, it's dramatically altered my view of people like that, because I was ignorant about what Satanists were like before, having never met any. Now knowing a couple of them? I have a very positive view, even though I will admit to having only really ever spoken to one of them, a fellow slave-girl, but based on what she's told me about him? They are both amazing, beautiful people and I love them deeply and wish that the light of love, joy, and good fortune will shine upon them for all of the days of their lives. She is an absolutely extraordinary girl and he must be a positively wonderful person to be the man and the Master of her dreams.
I feel pretty much that way towards the Master who Owns me, as well, though. Everything that I have ever wanted and never thought I'd get to have, Master and my relationship with Master are that. The fact that She is never going to be in love with me does not bother me, because I am in love with Her, and She nurtures it. She is in love with Eric, and Eric is in love with Her, and that gives me incredibly strong feelings of satisfaction and pleasure, knowing that I'm entering a home that already has that much love in it. Knowing that I will be completely welcome in that home and that I can contribute to it in some way is very deeply fulfilling.
Master has also promised that we will get Her ownership officially notarized. I am sure that Eric will be the witness that signs it, and there's apparently a notary in the Clarksville Kink Community, so it will be entirely possible for me to get a contract drafted and notarized. It won't be as legally binding, for instance, as a marriage, but it will nevertheless be legally binding to some degree and that's all I want.
Of course, there are going to be conventions on both sides of the document, things that we'll both have to agree to, but for my side, the Needs section is going to be pretty short. There's not a lot I intend to ask for, because there's not a lot that's important to me in the context of demanding it, in this relationship. This relationship is something I want so much that there's not a lot that I feel I will be important to ask for, none of it is anything I need to ask for because She's already promised it, but having it in the contract document is still a good idea.
Of course, the things I list as my personal needs that must be met for me to continue to be Her slave are, all of them, things I've already been promised.
The Master promises to ensure the continued emotional, spiritual, nutritional, physical and sexual health of the slave.
The Master promises not to impede the voting rights of the slave.
The Master promises not to impede the creative expression of the slave.
The Master promises not to impede the slave's access to the internet.
The Master promises not to impede the slave's right to have a pet.
The Master promises to work on the slave's limits at a pace which is comfortable for the slave.
These are all things that I feel are important and these are all things that Master promised to me as absolute guarantees. These are some of the rights She considers to be inviolable and to be things that She just doesn't want to change about me or take away from me. These are also the rights that I absolutely do not want to give up, so it means we're very compatible because those that She doesn't want to take away are the ones I don't want to give away, anyway.
There's going to be a lot more discussion about whether or not there're any other things that She wants control over. She's set a few rules, and I am eagerly anticipating more of them being set in stone, so to speak, especially out of the ones that I'm operating under the assumption that they'll be rules and so I'm obeying the before She's even verified that they're absolute rules. Primarily, it is a matter of being extra-respectful to the people in my life who matter to me, the people that I'm able to genuinely say that I love. There're a number of them, and I address every single lady that I love with the honorific of Miss unless she specifically asks me not to. I want to be a good girl and I want to be respectful to the people I love and to the people who are respectful towards me, too. I am a slave, that does not mean I am to be disrespected, and I fully expect that not talking to any disrespectful people will probably be added to the rules list at some point in my future, probably relatively soon, all things considered.
For now, Master is thinking about the things She wants to control, and when we have an actually comprehensive list, we'll be able to get it all laid out in the contract what I agree to submit to and what I agree to surrender to Her. I am hoping that She won't be shy about it, because there's not really a whole lot that She could ask for that I wouldn't voluntarily and enthusiastically surrender to Her control. All I want is to be able to just be a little girl with a Master that I can trust, and these're two things I already have. I have a Master in whom I can put my unwavering trust and devotion, and She allows me to just be a happy little girl that I want to be.
I love you Master, with all of my heart and with every fiber of my being.
I love you Master, as much as I have ever loved anyone in my whole life.
I trust you Master, and I trust that you have my best interests in your heart.
I promise to ask questions if I need something explained to me, Master.
I promise that I will never knowingly do anything to displease or disappoint.
I know that I will make mistakes, and that you will forgive me. Thank you for that, Master.
- Protected Slave and Property of the Magnificent Miss_Misanthropy,
Privileged to be Master's Adoring Pet Whore, Phee
YAY!!!
All right, now that I've gotten that out of my system, maybe I should share some of the causes of my childlike exuberance. I am fairly certain that Master actually likes the childlike exuberance, so there is always the justification that being exuberant isn't going to get me in trouble. She likes it when Her little girl is happy, and today, Her little girl is really happy, despite some ever-present negatives that I can't really escape yet. Like having woken up with a headache, or having a dog that whines when, and only when, my adoptive mother is around. I just want to say, Fawn is a very good dog, she is an incredible and sweet dog... except when my adoptive mother is around, which is when she whines, incessantly, and gets me yelled at and insulted. I get enough denigration and condescension on my own without your help, knock it off. I love you, but cut that shit out right now. Seriously.
However, there's positives! Lots of them, in my opinion, that make me absolutely ecstatic in a way I haven't been in two decades.
So where to begin? I think I'll begin with the phone call, since it's all thanks to Master in one way or another, and some of the subsequent feelings of excitement stem from certain things that She said, or shared, with me. I got to talk to Master for 8 minutes of absolute heaven. Her voice... ohh, wow. Her voice sets me at ease, it fills me with joy, it makes the whole world seem brighter, and cleaner. That right there was enough to neutralize a headache or two with just the happiness I felt no matter what else was going on.
In the course of the phone-call, however, She expressed very great confidence that I would be able to get down to Tennessee in January, and this makes me happier than I can remember being ever before in my life. Especially when She expressed confidence that I would be able to stay there, and that I wouldn't need to come back to my adoptive family except to get my stuff. That makes me just like, amazingly happy.
Then in the course of the phone-call, She also told me that She had bought some gifts for me. Okay, so there's only one of them that I'm actually going to put my hands on and touch it, the others... well, let's just say they're going to be touching me more than I'm going to be touching them. She got me a leather collar, and some toys She'll be able to use to play with me, and I'm looking forward to that with a lot of anticipation. I'm looking forward to a lot of things She's promised to do to me, though. I can't wait.
Then there's Eric. He's a positive because of Master as well, because if it were not for Master, I do not think I would have ever had the opportunity to know him. I have only really "known" him since the first of November, although I knew of him for years before that, he's Master's fiancee, and we have talked a few times online, and briefly on the phone. I'd like to talk to him on the phone some more, I guess, but I'm going to get to see and talk to him a lot in person. That's going to be great, because, I think I'm really starting to love him, too. Not in the same context as I love Master, of course, or at a bare minimum, not yet. Could I fall in love with him, too? I think so, he's just been a lovely, amazing person. He's been absolutely wonderful, he's made me feel welcomed, accepted, even invited into the dynamic and like I've been totally embraced by someone that did not have to accept me, even though they chose to do so. That is unfortunately more heartwarming than I have words to describe accurately, and he's a major part of what makes this such a comfortable relationship and situation, for me.
I've also been making a lot of good friends on FetLife. Out of respect, I won't put their actual names on here without them giving me express permission, but sufficed to say, they are just some of really the most amazing people. I've even met a couple of Satanists and that's really opened my eyes, it's dramatically altered my view of people like that, because I was ignorant about what Satanists were like before, having never met any. Now knowing a couple of them? I have a very positive view, even though I will admit to having only really ever spoken to one of them, a fellow slave-girl, but based on what she's told me about him? They are both amazing, beautiful people and I love them deeply and wish that the light of love, joy, and good fortune will shine upon them for all of the days of their lives. She is an absolutely extraordinary girl and he must be a positively wonderful person to be the man and the Master of her dreams.
I feel pretty much that way towards the Master who Owns me, as well, though. Everything that I have ever wanted and never thought I'd get to have, Master and my relationship with Master are that. The fact that She is never going to be in love with me does not bother me, because I am in love with Her, and She nurtures it. She is in love with Eric, and Eric is in love with Her, and that gives me incredibly strong feelings of satisfaction and pleasure, knowing that I'm entering a home that already has that much love in it. Knowing that I will be completely welcome in that home and that I can contribute to it in some way is very deeply fulfilling.
Master has also promised that we will get Her ownership officially notarized. I am sure that Eric will be the witness that signs it, and there's apparently a notary in the Clarksville Kink Community, so it will be entirely possible for me to get a contract drafted and notarized. It won't be as legally binding, for instance, as a marriage, but it will nevertheless be legally binding to some degree and that's all I want.
Of course, there are going to be conventions on both sides of the document, things that we'll both have to agree to, but for my side, the Needs section is going to be pretty short. There's not a lot I intend to ask for, because there's not a lot that's important to me in the context of demanding it, in this relationship. This relationship is something I want so much that there's not a lot that I feel I will be important to ask for, none of it is anything I need to ask for because She's already promised it, but having it in the contract document is still a good idea.
Of course, the things I list as my personal needs that must be met for me to continue to be Her slave are, all of them, things I've already been promised.
The Master promises to ensure the continued emotional, spiritual, nutritional, physical and sexual health of the slave.
The Master promises not to impede the voting rights of the slave.
The Master promises not to impede the creative expression of the slave.
The Master promises not to impede the slave's access to the internet.
The Master promises not to impede the slave's right to have a pet.
The Master promises to work on the slave's limits at a pace which is comfortable for the slave.
These are all things that I feel are important and these are all things that Master promised to me as absolute guarantees. These are some of the rights She considers to be inviolable and to be things that She just doesn't want to change about me or take away from me. These are also the rights that I absolutely do not want to give up, so it means we're very compatible because those that She doesn't want to take away are the ones I don't want to give away, anyway.
There's going to be a lot more discussion about whether or not there're any other things that She wants control over. She's set a few rules, and I am eagerly anticipating more of them being set in stone, so to speak, especially out of the ones that I'm operating under the assumption that they'll be rules and so I'm obeying the before She's even verified that they're absolute rules. Primarily, it is a matter of being extra-respectful to the people in my life who matter to me, the people that I'm able to genuinely say that I love. There're a number of them, and I address every single lady that I love with the honorific of Miss unless she specifically asks me not to. I want to be a good girl and I want to be respectful to the people I love and to the people who are respectful towards me, too. I am a slave, that does not mean I am to be disrespected, and I fully expect that not talking to any disrespectful people will probably be added to the rules list at some point in my future, probably relatively soon, all things considered.
For now, Master is thinking about the things She wants to control, and when we have an actually comprehensive list, we'll be able to get it all laid out in the contract what I agree to submit to and what I agree to surrender to Her. I am hoping that She won't be shy about it, because there's not really a whole lot that She could ask for that I wouldn't voluntarily and enthusiastically surrender to Her control. All I want is to be able to just be a little girl with a Master that I can trust, and these're two things I already have. I have a Master in whom I can put my unwavering trust and devotion, and She allows me to just be a happy little girl that I want to be.
I love you Master, with all of my heart and with every fiber of my being.
I love you Master, as much as I have ever loved anyone in my whole life.
I trust you Master, and I trust that you have my best interests in your heart.
I promise to ask questions if I need something explained to me, Master.
I promise that I will never knowingly do anything to displease or disappoint.
I know that I will make mistakes, and that you will forgive me. Thank you for that, Master.
- Protected Slave and Property of the Magnificent Miss_Misanthropy,
Privileged to be Master's Adoring Pet Whore, Phee
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